Be Secure Online Blog

What is Sexting?

The scourge of every Schoolyard!

Updated Oct 2021: Kids are naturally fascinated by adult content, which is how we refer to pornography. It is so hard for Teachers, parents to have this talk. Sexting is our most requested internet safety talk for Senior schools. Bookings Enquiry 

sexting parents talks internet safety talks schools london dublin kildare Making sure kids know in advance is the key to messaging on sexting. Blunt, direct, honest is the best way to warn them about the dangers of sexting.

Sexting, the most difficult conversation?

The main purpose of the Talks is to explain the consequences, making Students aware of the effects on their future, careers, interests, relationships. What does sexting mean? It is a combination of sex and texting, known as sexting. Kids have been texting suggestively to each other since the mid-1990s. It's not new, it's much more explicit and graphic now, obviously.

We have to be direct, honest, make an impact. It needs to be as the aim is to prevent them from experimenting with cameras, phones and filming themselves. Then telling the straight out truth NOT to share it with anyone online. If they film sex, private parts to delete and forget about it forever. Some things can't be put back in the bottle.

How to start?

This is the reason we do talks. Most parents just can't talk to kids in this way about this topic, somewhat like our parents. The best way is a combination of asking about sexting and waiting for a response. If you are very lucky, they will talk about it and you will warn them gently about the consequences.

They are much more likely to ignore us from embarrassment rather than intentionally. Start again another day. Make it clear this is a conversation that is going to happen. 

Sadly, there are many examples in the media, and most kids will know from experience examples where images and videos went viral only to ruin a career, a relationship, or a reputation. We use these stories can be a great opportunity to talk with your teen about sexting. 

Make it very clear, ‘that you show me yours and I will show you mine’ is an expensive game. Fun but a disaster afterwards. Teenage relationships end, emotions run high, and pictures get distributed. Make sure your kids understand that most likely this picture will be shared and the people doing the sharing will be their friends.

Sexting normally takes place on Snapchat.

Sexting internet safety, dangers of sexting, smart phone sexting But Mum, she said, everyone is at it, sexting. That is simply not true says Facebook. The consequences of getting caught out are depressing, in every way.

Mum, everyone is doing it.

Wrong. Facebook owners of Instagram and WhatsApp say they have researched this a lot. Here is what they found.

  • Sexting moves through a small group of people very intensely
  • It generates enormous activity.
  • People share and re-share more often than other content.
  • Interest quickly changes to new topics.
  • The mood of those involved usually changes noticeably
  • Sexting doesn't bother some people at all
  • Some boys are very sensitive to sexting incidents
  • Dick & Boob pics are most common

It is worth noting that a small group of people might be a couple of thousand to Facebook.

Sexting Talks  

In our talks, we use real examples to drive this message home to Students, Young Adults, the impact on mental wellbeing, friendships, jobs, college and careers. Get through School and College without incident, that's the message. Mistakes will happen and you can recover from them too.  

Schools, Colleges even Employers often mention sexting in connection with cyberbullying. People who sext usually feel mocked, coerced, or solicited— bullied into the behaviour and bullied because of the behaviour. Our most-read ever Online Reputation  

Is this just for Senior Schools?

No, the advent of the iPhone smartphone in 2007 was a game-changer. Kids are now viewing pornography (sometimes extreme) as young as 8 years of age. Girl and Boys are exchanging videos, images and or live streaming, which is easily done on Instagram or Snapchat as young as 11 years of age. Most 11-year-old kids or 12-year-old kids own a smartphone, so they all have the capacity. Most parents have not implemented parental control. As a result, we are doing the sexting talk in an age-appropriate fashion from 11 years of age only at the request of the School, parents, teachers, Head of School. Kids Talk Page 

Create Healthy Boundaries

As kids approach puberty, we talk about changes in their body, relationships, and sexuality — teaching them about risks and how to avoid them. Telling kids about sexting is important. Your kids will need to know why NOT to sext and what to do if they feel that someone is pressuring them into it.

Even if the image, video, or text was meant for one person, once it's been sent or posted, it's out of their control. Frequent conversations in small doses are more effective than just one long, boring, threatening lecture about not sexting and staying safe on the Internet. 

Being a parent and not a friend to your kids develops safety, appropriate use, and texting boundaries. As new relationships develop, talk about respect and spending face-to-face time with their friends. This forms a good foundation for healthy boundaries, self-respect, and safety you want to instil in them.

  • Why do they feel compelled to offer sexual content or to ask for it?
  • Are they being pressured by friends?
  • Do they feel like they need attention and is that attention healthy?

Keep talking about the above gently. Conversations like this should occur throughout kids' lives, not just when problems arise.

Persistence Pays Off

It might be pretty tempting to just shut down your teen’s phone when they come home from school. Doing so could end in mistrust and result in your teen hiding more from you than before.

Parental control software monitors and limits when and what websites or apps your child can access. Keeping up with what your child is doing online and setting some of your boundaries with them can protect your family. 

Contact us, for more information or to book an internet safety talk for kids in your school.

Articles of Interest

Articles, links and connections from the BeSecureOnline site you might find interesting.    

Article about Online Reputation

Need to know - Snapchat 

Let's talk about Sexting

Pics on teenagers' phone Help!

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